New Year's Challenge

Yesterday, I had the privilege of sharing in the first chapel of the year at Bethel Baptist Christian Academy in Jamestown, NY.  I got on the schedule early, so I had my choice of dates this year.  I gave the kids a challenge that I wanted to share here, as well.

What would happen if your relationship with your spouse, or a good friend, only consisted of time, or conversations, when someone else asked you to spend time with them.  What if you ignored all requests from the person themselves, and would only communicate with them when someone else asked you to.  What type of relationship would you have?

You might be thinking, "No one would expect a relationship like that to survive, no one!"  But many times, Christians expect just such a relationship to survive, and even be healthy.  Many people who attend church on a weekly basis only pick up their Bibles when someone else (Pastor, S.S. teacher) asks them to "Open your Bibles to . . ."  Some people rarely pray unless someone else leads them in it.  And yet, many times, this type of a relationship is expected to be beneficial in a person's life.  I think it is obvious why such a relationship would have very limited benefit.

So what can we do about it?

First: We need to be people of God's Word.  Nothing of any spiritual value will happen in our lives apart from God's inspired Word.  Nothing.  So if we want something to happen in our lives, we must get God's Word into our hearts and lives.  We must read it, we must digest it, we must live it.  If you have never read it through, this would be a good time to start!  In just about 15 minutes a day, you could read through your Bible this year.  In 30 minutes, you could read through your Bible twice in a year.  And which of us doesn't waste at least that much time each and every day?

Second: We need to spend time in prayer.  To have a relationship, we need to communicate both ways.  Prayer is an opportunity to allow God to tune our hearts to His.  And informed by our reading of His Word, our prayers will be effective and beneficial in our lives.

Third: We need to be people of God's House.  We need to make a commitment to be in God's House as often as we can.  Why?  For added opportunities for learning.  For the encouragement of others who are walking down the same road.  For the joy of celebrating our Lord together.  For the fellowship we have by being with people with shared values, beliefs and goals.  For the accountability in our walk with the Lord.

If we are purposeful in these areas during the coming 12 months, we will see much spiritual benefit in our lives.  We will be a vessel that God can use for His glory.  We will see God working in our lives in ways we have never seen before.  Are you up for the challenge?  Will you improve in these areas of your life this year to see God work through you?  I hope you will.

"Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,  I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus."

- Philippians 3:13-14

Life in a fog . . .

I feel like I have been living my life in a fog.  Just over 2 months ago, a good friend passed away.  He was a godly man, so it was an easy funeral to put together.  He was a friend, so it was a hard funeral to put together.  The family are also good friends, so it was an easy funeral to do, and a hard funeral to do.  I felt better after the funeral, but remained somewhat in a fog.  He had passed away so suddenly, none of us had any time to process.

A week later, another man passed away.  This man had attended somewhat regularly from time to time, and had a long history of being ill.  I did not know him well, but greatly cared for him and his wife.  It was a totally different funeral, and easy and hard for different reasons.  This funeral was more draining, but I at least felt that I had ministered to the family well.  The funeral director even told me that he has listened to so many funeral services, that he is often very callous  to them.  He continued that even though he didn't know the man, the message connected with him and had a sense of hope that he doesn't often hear.

A week ago, my neighbor, and a friend as well as a church member went out to shovel a path to her mailbox, or shovel off her car - we're not sure.  She did this in the middle of a storm that ended up dumping 3-4 feet of snow on us over about 3 days.  We're not sure whether she slipped, or had a stroke or heart attack, but she ended up falling.  By the time help was called and she was taken to the ER, it was too late.  God had called her home.  That funeral was Friday.

3 funerals in just over 2 months.  Not all that rare for some situations.  But for a small country church this has been extremely rare.  This blog exists because life can get us down.  I have been down.  Not depressed, not miserable, but distracted.  Our Sunday School Lesson yesterday reminded me that Satan can use many things to 'darken' our lives, to keep us away from the light.  I have been letting life happen to me, instead of happening to my life.  Why do I say that?  Discipline has been very low in my life the last couple of months.  Family Bible time, being purposeful with my wife and children, study time for church work, eating habits and exercise have all suffered in different ways.  Each lapse of discipline takes away some of the light that should be in my life.

This blog also exists because, although life can get us down, God can help us up.  Today, I choose to happen to my life in a godly way.  I choose to spend the time to do what needs to be done, not wasting days at a time.  I choose to let my beliefs and values impact my schedule and choices.  Why?  Because "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me."  Because "They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength."  For me, these things would be impossible.  But "with God, nothing shall be impossible."

If life's got you down (depressed, distracted, discouraged) look to God, He'll lift you back up!

Politicians

We all love to hate politicians.  We pick on their propensity to say what people want to hear and then do whatever they want to do.  They are reviled, ridiculed, threatened, and repeatedly voted back into office.  I guess our judgment of them is normally fairly accurate.  However, accurate doesn't make it right.

Romans 2 tells us not to judge lest we be judged.  "But I would never lie that way," we might say.  The political system we have just makes it easier to attack others' faults because they are right out there in the open.  Carl Paladino, Republican candidate for governor in NY forwarded emails that were off color, offensive and demeaning to different groups of people (women, blacks, etc.).  We say off color, we mean sinful.  Sinful because the spirit of those emails violate God's law first and foremost.  Why did he do it?  Because he found humor in them to some degree and thought that others would find humor in them as well.  We would never do that! Our first reaction.  Yet, how often does someone tell a joke, prefacing it with "It's a little dirty, but it's really funny."  What would the spotlight of political campaigning show in our lives?

The truth is, we can never change another person.  No matter how hard we try, we just cannot make another person behave in the way that we think is appropriate.  So, do we just throw up our arms when it comes to politics?  Absolutely not!  But when it comes to finding faults that need to be fixed, we need to focus the spotlight on our own lives.  It is easy to focus on the faults in another's life.  But what about those faults in my life?  What excuses do I make for my shortcomings (also translated as sin).

What should we do?  We should use the same intensity as an investigative journalist to ferret out the sin that is present in our own lives.  We should be relentless in discovering, digging up, and disposing of those things that are not conformed to the image of Christ in our lives.

What about others?  We need to show grace.  Every time we see something in a politician that we don't like, it should motivate us to make sure our lives are not the same way.  If we do, their sin will help us clean up our sin.  That would be a nice way to recycle the trash from someone else's life into something beautiful in our own.

Forgiveness

When we first learned to forgive, we were probably standing next to a sibling or a classmate.  They were very reluctantly or insincerely offering an apology for something they probably didn't feel any remorse for.  And we were taught to say "I forgive you" and the adult told us to hug, shake hands, smile or whatever.  And now everything was better.  I'm not against that system of teaching by any means, but it has come to my attention that sometimes we, as adults, still try to make forgiveness work in the same way.

We will forgive, sure, if you count being able to vocalize that we forgive someone for something.  Although, adults rarely face their offenders, and if they do, have learned to cover over the reluctance and insincerity with many more layers and facades.

For the past several years, I have been learning that forgiveness isn't just an academic flipping of a switch.  We cannot just say that we forgive.  I have learned that forgiveness hasn't happened until the pain is gone.  Often, people will say that they have forgiven, but will readily state that they will not be hurt by that person again.  Pain is still present.  Or, "Oh yes, I've forgiven them," but go on to say that they can't stand to see them, or hear them talk about some matter, or be reminded in some way of what they did.  Pain is still present.  Forgiveness does not happen until the pain is gone.

Several posts ago, I focused on pain.  Pain is a blessing given by God to alert us that there is something wrong.  No one enjoys suffering with pain, in fact, my back let me know that something was wrong yesterday, and I wished it could have waited to give me that message until a more convenient time.  However, pain is there to tell us something is wrong and we need to fix it.  I cannot 'fix' other people.  I cannot remove what other people have done.  I can only fix my responses, my feelings, and my choices in the matter.  When there is still pain, it is never that the other person needs to change.  It would be nice if they would.  It would be a big blessing if they would.  But pain alerts the person who feels it that something is wrong.

What is wrong when we feel pain for an offense that has not been forgiven?  There are several things wrong.  First: we have not forgiven in the same way that God has forgiven us.  If we love God, we need to keep His commandments, otherwise, we will feel pain.  Second: when we choose not to forgive, we give a small slice of control over our life to the person who hurt us.  As a Christian, God is the only one who is to have that control.  And even apart from that, who willingly gives control of their life to a person who has hurt them?  Thirdly: when we don't forgive, it places a burden on a relationship that God may have given us to be an opportunity for ministry.  All of these reasons cause pain, because their is something wrong that we need to fix.

By all means, keep going through the motions of forgiveness.  Say you're sorry.  Say "I forgive you."  Give a hug, send a card, smile.  But make sure the pain goes away when you do it.  If it doesn't, remind yourself that they are forgiven.  Give another hug, send another card, bake a pie, cake or cookies (for them :)), and make sure that the pain is gone.  Love them until it is completely gone.  And then keep on loving them.

"And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."  

- Ephesians 4:32

I Choose Joy

Each life will have it's ups and downs

Each day brings both smiles and frowns

A lesson I learned long ago

Despite the sorrow, I choose joy

At times our hearts will ache and break

And we not know what we can take

Yet through it all the lesson stands

Even in pain, I choose joy

The Bible gives a promise true

A promise that is for me and for you

The lesson for each, at any time

A choice we have, I choose joy

I know my Savior loves me so

He paid a debt that I did owe

His gift has made it plain for all

There is a choice, I choose joy

Through years of life, through bad and good

I've found that my God always would

Do good for me in all I've seen

The choice is clear, I choose joy

Today we have a difficult day

It's even hard to stand and say

Yet by God's grace in even this

We each can say, I choose joy

Eber Kinne

Home with His Savior ~ October 5, 2010

"Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness; To the end that my glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever." Psalm 30:11-12

Adjusting Schedules

Since the last time I posted here, we have started school.  With 4 kids being taught this year, and adjusting to taking over the math class for my two oldest, we have been ironing out the schedule.  Whenever it seems we have another wrinkle ironed out, another one pops up.  We've tried moving around the math classes, and spreading out the kids for various tasks throughout the house when they need to say things out loud, or read where someone else's instruction won't disturb them.  I think we have come to realize that homeschooling in a house with 6 children will always include some wrinkles.

The same holds true for our personal schedules.  We try to plan ahead, to check on things to make sure there aren't wrinkles.  But almost without fail, a wrinkle (or two, or more) will enter our lives.  I thought my schedule was going to work out for a laid back Monday this week.  Monday is my usual day off and I try to make it a day with very little on the calendar.  So Monday ends up being one of the days that most often gets attacked with wrinkles.  Probably because there is nothing scheduled, when someone asks if I am available to help, . . . I normally am.

I suppose if we know wrinkles are coming, we need to determine in advance how we will respond to them.  It would be a great world to not have any wrinkles, but maybe the world could be just as great if we determined to not allow wrinkles to affect us negatively.  How?  By determining ahead how we will respond.  By asking God for strength to respond appropriately.  By trusting that God has a purpose for the wrinkle that we may not understand, but can fulfill by responding in a way that honors Him.

I hope your day progresses without wrinkles today.  But I pray that we will each respond to whatever wrinkles we find in a way that glorifies God.

"This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it." - Psalm 118:24

Choose Wisely

We are faced with choices almost non-stop in our daily lives.  When to get up, what to do, what to wear, what to eat, how to respond to others, when to go to bed, and each choice impacts other choices we make. 

Growing up, I remember often hearing the phrase "Choose wisely."  It was probably applied more to friends and how I responded to my parents in obeying what they had asked me to do.  Today it reaches out into far more areas.  In grocery shopping, I try to choose wisely by buying the size and brand that gives me the most food for the least money.  Many purchase decisions involve a balancing act between quality and price.  Time management is based on accomplishing things of value rather than wasting time.

How often do we think of choosing wisely as adults?  We don't have a parent leaning over our shoulder reminding us to measure the wisdom of our choices.  Many times, our choices end up being made by what feels right at the moment, whether we're feeling pain, discomfort, hunger, anger, or joy, our decisions are often based on our circumstances. 

In I Samuel 25, David was responding to his circumstances in anger.  He was going to get what was due him.  Providentially, God sent Abigail to David to remind him of his need to choose wisely.  He did, and blessings were all around for almost all involved. 

It reminds me of how we need to be voices reminding others to "choose wisely."  Not scolding and railing on, but gently reminding others to consider the consequences of their choices.  We also need "Abigails" in our lives to remind us to think about the choices we make.  Maybe this will be a needed reminder for you today, I'm hoping it will be a reminder for me when I am tempted to respond without considering the consequences.

And David said to Abigail, Blessed be the LORD God of Israel, which sent thee this day to meet me: And blessed be thy advice, and blessed be thou, which hast kept me this day from coming to shed blood, and from avenging myself with mine own hand.

- I Samuel 25:32-33